Tag Archives: Seeking

March 26th, 2009

The Discovery channel has “Shark Week”. There is actually a “Cholesterol Awareness Month” and a “Child Passenger Safety Week”. I have new one: March is Death Month. My brother died in March 1998, my mother died in March 2005, something died in me in March 2008 and now my father in 2009.

I’m not getting out of bed for the entire month of March 2010.

Death is a corrective. It plays the role of Law. It is not what we are made for, but it is a mercy in that it serves as a doorway FROM brokeness to potential wholeness. A necessary evil. Gollum.

Followers of Christ must not forget, however, that the crucifixion is not the end of the story. Death, our ugly, pitied, insane, little guide does not have the last word.

Easter is coming.

December 11th, 2008

Once again..it’s been a while…

From last Spring until now has been largely positive. I believe, in part, due to the attitude I adopted above. I don’t mean this to be an arrogant statement, and I don’t mean to rob anyone else of credit. In fact, I’m a little embarrassed to say it because all it really represents is me stepping up to a base-line, mature attitude.

Letting go of “the prize” has proven to be a good thing all around. I don’t think “love is dead” anymore, but I sure don’t recognize it as the love I’ve been striving for. I’ll take it, though.

I’m doing my level best to stay focused on a “Holy, Terrible, Internal Resolve” and Brenda, I hope, will choose to come along in that effort. But that is her choice.

My “resolve” orbits a few scraps of experience and knowledge which don’t as yet form any solid whole. They may never from a solid whole…I don’t know.

JESUS CHRIST and His Gospel is the nucleus. I am more convinced than I have ever been that this Gospel is the center of and source of all Truth.

MY IDENTITY has solid quality to it that it has never had before. I know who I am and I’m becoming increasingly comfortable with it.







If I had to force these things into a temporal expression of some kind, it would look like a monastery. I can think of no other word to better describe it. “Finding” the Northumbria Community last Spring (coincidence?) and blending this new monasticism with the co-housing concept has brought two large puzzle pieces together.

Good stuff. I feel alive.